"Oh God, he's on stage with Elton John
He's got a motherfucking pink GLAAD T-Shirt on, huggin' a homosexual flippin' the cameras off"
"But at the Grammys? Thought Slim hated the Grammys"
No, I said, "You think I give a damn about a Grammy?"
You never answered me
Now had you have asked me, I'da told you exactly why I wasn't here last year
See, there's nominees for the best album
Rap's got a separate category, now how come?
What are we, peons? Fuck Celine Dion
Pee on your corny award show you want me on
But guess what? That means you win
I can't give in and let y'all beat me again
Plus, this year
My record's almost diamond
I'm in the same category as Paul Simon
Ain't no other rap in the category I'm in
But they're callin' me to the stage, tellin' me I win
So just as I go on to approach the podium
The crowd's goin' nuts like they're about to explode or somethin'
Expecting me to give some acceptance speech that's gonna knock each motherfucker out of their seats
But the truth is I ain't have shit to say
Except "Thanks, but you shoulda gave this shit to Dre"
